


K unit's incorrect quotes

by Mistressofmusic



Category: Alex Rider - Anthony Horowitz
Genre: Incorrect Quotes, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-19
Updated: 2021-03-19
Packaged: 2021-03-28 20:48:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30145395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mistressofmusic/pseuds/Mistressofmusic
Summary: K unit's incorrect quotes
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Credit to https://incorrect-quotes-generator.neocities.org/

Cub: Anyone d-  
Fox: Depressed?  
Wolf: Drained?  
Snake: Dumb?  
Eagle: Disliked?  
Cub: -done with their work... what is wrong with you people ...

#####  
Cub: Favorite horror movie?  
Fox: It  
Wolf: Saw  
Snake: Annabelle  
Eagle: High School Musical. after watching it I spent all my middle school years terrified that the entire school would start singing something and I’d be the only one who didn’t know the lyrics

#####  
Cub: You really put aside everything and came all this way for me? How did you even get here so fast?  
Fox: Several traffic violations.  
Wolf: Three counts of resisting arrest.  
Snake: Roughly thirteen cans of energy drinks.  
Eagle: Also, that’s not our car.

#####  
Cub: We’ve been conducting an ongoing study to see what Wolf will and will not eat.  
Fox: Grass? Yes!  
Cub: Moss? Yes!!  
Fox: Leaves? Ohh, yes!  
Cub: Shoelaces? Strange but true!  
Fox: Worms? Sometimes!  
Cub: Rocks? Usually nah.  
Fox: Twigs? Usually!  
Cub: Eagle's cooking? Inconclusive!  
Snake: How did you… test this?  
Cub: You just hand them stuff and say ‘eat this’ and if they eat it, they eat it.  
Snake: ... I don’t know how to feel about this.  
Eagle: IS THAT WHERE ALL MY SPARE SHOELACES WENT?

#####  
Cub, trying to convince Eagle to join the group: You know... I thought it'd be good to have someone come along who's really... strong!  
Fox: And loud!  
Wolf: And happy!  
Snake: And oblivious to reality!  
Eagle:

#####  
Cub: Are we really going to let Fox keep Wolf?  
Snake: We kept Eagle.

#####  
Cub: What if the person who named Walkie Talkies named everything?  
Fox: Pregnancy tests are Maybe Babies  
Eagle: Socks are Feetie Heaties  
Snake: Forks are Stabby Grabbies  
Fox: Defibrillators are Heartie Starties  
Eagle: Nightmares are Dreamy Screamies  
Snake: Stamps are Lickie Stickies  
Wolf, annoyed: You are disappointments

#####  
Cub: What did you guys get in your yearbook?  
Fox: 'Prettiest Smile'  
Eagle: 'Nicest Personality'  
Wolf: 'Most likely to start a bar fight'  
Snake: 'Least likely to start a bar fight, but most likely to win one'

#####  
Cub: Bridge the generation gap by combining old and new slang into one!  
Fox: Tubular AF!  
Wolf: Mood to the max!  
Snake, annoyed: Groovy, I hate it.  
Eagle, just as annoyed: If she breathes, she’s a square.

#####  
Cub: Why isn’t the statue smirking at me?  
Fox: It isn’t smirking at anyone, they’re all just imagining it.  
Cub: Three of us saw it, Fox. How do you explain that?  
Fox: *points at Wolf* Sleep deprivation. *points at Snake* Paranoia. *points at Eagle* Delusional personality disorder.


	2. Chapter 2

*The squad is over at Cub's house*  
Fox: Ohhhh, we each get our own oven?  
Cub: ... N-No...  
Cub, laughing: How many ovens do you think I have???  
Fox, motioning to their kitchen: Three, I thought!  
Sarge: I see a-  
Cub, motioning to one device: This is a microwave.  
Fox: Oh, well I-  
Cub: Hey wait wait, actually- hang on- *fiddles with the buttons on the microwave*  
Cub, amazed: Its got a bake setting!  
Wolf: Ohoho, you learn something new every day!  
Eagle: Do we- Do we roshambo for who gets to pick first?  
Cub: Now I've just discovered I have more ovens than I thought, we don't have to roshambo nothin!  
Cub: I am someone who owns four ovens...  
Cub, louder and way too happy: I am someone... who owns FOUR OVENS...  
Cub: I didn't know I was so rich with ovens...  
Snake, pointing to another appliance: Also the toaster oven!  
Cub:  
Fox: Ohhh, toasty boy! Four- Five ovens!  
Cub:  
Cub, fucking ECSTATIC: I AM SOMEONE WHO OWNS FIVE OVENS  
#####  
*Everyone is standing around the broken coffee maker*  
Sarge: So. Who broke it? I'm not mad, I just wanna know.  
Everyone:  
Fox: ...I did. I broke it.  
Sarge: No. No you didn't. Cub?  
Cub: Don't look at me. Look at Wolf.  
Wolf: What?! I didn't break it.  
Cub: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?  
Wolf: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.  
Cub: Suspicious.  
Wolf: No, it's not!  
Eagle: If it matters, probably not, but Snake was the last one to use it.  
Snake: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!  
Eagle: Oh really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?  
Snake: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Eagle!  
Fox: Okay let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, sarge.  
Sarge: No! Who broke it!?  
Everyone:  
Eagle: sarge... Cub's been awfully quiet.  
Cub: rEALLY?!  
*Everyone starts arguing*  
Sarge, being interviewed: I broke it. I burned my hand so I punched it.  
Sarge: I predict 10 minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with warpaint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.  
Sarge:  
Sarge: Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.  
#####  
Cub: Just be yourself.  
Fox: 'Be myself'? Cub, I have one day to win Sarge over. How long did it take before you guys started liking me?  
Wolf: Couple weeks.  
Eagle: Six months.  
Snake: Jury’s still out.  
Fox: See, Cub?  
Fox: 'Be myself'. What kind of garbage advice is that?  
#####  
*The squad right before Cub's wedding*  
Fox: Well I have to go, I have a wedding to attend.  
Sarge: Wait... Oh! I have a wedding to attend too!  
Wolf: Oh, I have a wedding to attend as well  
Eagle: I THINK WE ALL HAVE WEDDINGS TO ATTEND  
Snake, panicked: I THINK I HAVE A WEDDING TO OFFICIATE  
#####  
Cub: Time for plan G.  
Fox: Don’t you mean plan B?  
Cub: No, we tried plan B a long time ago. I had to skip over plan C due to technical difficulties.  
Sarge: What about plan D?  
Cub: Plan D was that desperate disguise attempt half an hour ago.  
Snake: What about plan E?  
Cub: I’m hoping not to use it. Eagle dies in plan E.  
Wolf: I like plan E.  
#####  
Cub: Croissants: dropped  
Fox: Road: works ahead  
Sarge: BBQ sauce: on my titties  
Wolf: Shavacado: fre  
Eagle: Miss Keisha: fuckin dead  
Snake:  
Snake, grumpy: I didn’t understand a single word of that and I hate every single one of you.  
#####  
Cub: If you bite it and you die, it’s poisonous. If it bites you and you die, it’s venomous.  
Fox: What if it bites me and it dies!?  
Sarge: Then you’re poisonous. Jesus Christ, Fox, learn to listen.  
Wolf: What if it bites itself and I die?  
Eagle: That’s voodoo.  
Snake: What if it bites me and someone else dies?  
Fox: That’s correlation, not causation.  
Wolf: What if we bite each other, and neither of us die?  
Eagle: That’s kinky.  
Cub: Oh my God.  
#####  
Cub: I CAN'T DO IT!  
Fox, laughing: I CAN'T EITHER!  
Cub: I CANT FUCKING DO IT ANYMORE  
Sarge: WELL I'LL TELL YOU WHAT, YOU CAN EITHER GIVE UP NOW, OR YOU CAN FIGURE IT OUT. BECAUSE WE CERTAINLY CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT YOU, AND WE KNOW YOU CAN'T DO IT WITHOUT US.  
Cub:  
Cub: I appreciate it,  
Cub: BUT LOOK WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH-  
Wolf: Cub-  
Cub: YOU GOTTA DRAW THE LINE SOMEWHERE!  
Eagle: Cub we gotta-  
Cub: YOU GOTTA DRAW A FUCKING LINE IN THE SAND. YOU GOTTA MAKE A STATEMENT.  
Cub: YOU GOTTA LOOK INSIDE YOURSELF AND SAY 'What am I willing to put up with today?'  
Cub, motioning to Snake: NOT FUCKING THIS  
#####  
*Squad reactions to being told ‘I love you’*  
Cub: Thanks fam!  
Fox: oh no  
Sarge: *cries* I love you too  
Wolf: Sounds fake but okay  
Eagle: *A flustered mess*  
Snake: can i get a refund  
#####  
Cub: Hewwo.  
Fox: Hihiiiiii!  
Sarge: Greetings, Humans.  
Eagle: Three kinds of people.  
Wolf: I want pudding.  
Cub: Four kinds of people.  
Snake: WHAT’S UP FUCKERS?  
Eagle: Five kinds of people.  
#####  
Cub: Who the fuck added me to a fucking group chat?  
Fox: >:O language  
Sarge: Yeah watch your fucking language  
Wolf: OKAY WHO TAUGHT SARGE THE FUCK WORD?  
Eagle: 'The fuck word'.  
Snake: Are you stupid? You guys use the f word all the time  
Sarge: Oh my god they censored it  
Eagle: Say fuck, Snake.  
Sarge: Do it, Snake. Say fuck.  
#####  
Cub: Everytime I hear someone talking about updog, I’m torn between not wanting to fall for it and wanting to help them complete their joke.  
Fox: Okay, but what is updog?  
Sarge: Updog is a long sausage in a bun, often served with ketchup, mustard, onions, and/or relish.  
Wolf: Not, that’s a hot dog. An updog is when a new version or patch of an application is released.  
Eagle: No, that's an update. You’re thinking of the fourth largest city in Sweden.  
Snake: Surely, that’s Uppsala, where’s updog is the giant spider in Harry Potter.  
Cub: That’s Aragog. Updog is a symbol conventionally used for an arbitrarily small number in analysis proofs.  
Wolf: You’re thinking of epsilon. Updog is an upward-moving air current.  
Sarge: No, that’s an updraft. An updog is the modern version of a henway.  
Fox: What’s a henway??  
Cub: Oh, about five pounds.  
#####  
Cub, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.  
Fox: Hey.  
Sarge: Hi.  
Wolf: Hello.  
Eagle: Hey!  
Cub: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!  
Snake: We were out of Doritos.  
#####  
Cub: Well, aren’t you all a rag-tag group of adventurers with unclear goals and good hearts! Oh, let me guess: you’re out to save the world!  
Fox: Well, actually, that sounds like a pretty fair assessment.  
Sarge: More or less, I guess...  
Wolf: That sounds awesome! Let’s do that!  
Eagle: I’m new here, but I am open to the concept.  
Snake: I thought that’s what we were doing, guys, come on!  
#####  
Cub: We need to distract these guys  
Fox: Leave it to me  
Fox: Centaurs have six limbs and are therefore insects. Discuss.  
Sarge, Wolf, and Eagle: *Immediately begin arguing*  
Snake, watching in horror: Oh this. I don’t like this. I don't like this at all.  
#####  
Fox: Cub... How do I begin to explain cub?  
Sarge: Cub is flawless.  
Wolf: I hear their hair's insured for $10,000.  
Eagle: I hear they do car commercials... in Japan.  
Snake: One time they punched me in the face... it was awesome.  
#####  
Cub: Dumbest scar stories, go!  
Fox: I burned my tongue once drinking tea.  
Sarge: I dropped a hair dryer on my leg once and burned it.  
Wolf: I have a piece of graphite in my leg for accidentally stabbing myself with a pencil in the first grade.  
Eagle: I was taking a cup of noodles out of the microwave and spilled it on my hand and I got a really bad burn.  
Snake:  
Snake: I have emotional scars.  
#####  
Cub: Would you guys be there for me if I was going through something?  
Fox: Nope, absolutely not.  
Sarge: I hope it sucks, whatever you're going through.  
Wolf: I hope it emotionally scars you for the rest of your life.  
Eagle: I hope you reach out to me so I can ignore you.  
Snake: I can't wait to go to your funeral, knowing I could've changed that outcome.  
#####  
Cub: *Posts a super low-quality image to the group chat*  
Fox: If I had a dollar for every pixel in this image, I’d have 15 cents  
Cub: If I had a dollar for every ounce of rage I felt in my body after I read this text, I would have enough money to buy a cannon to fire at you  
Sarge: Actually I did the math, Fox would have $225, not $0.15.  
Fox: Fam I’m right here....  
Wolf: If I had a dollar I would buy a can of soda :)  
Cub: while you’re there could you buy me an apply juice please?  
Wolf: Sorry I only have a dollar  
Cub: :(  
Sarge: Hey I just realized my friend is right, Fox would have $22,500 because it's a dollar for every pixel, not a cent  
Wolf: If I had $22,500 I would buy a can of soda and an apply juice  
Sarge: You can buy anything you want with $22,500  
Eagle: Yeah and they want soda and apply juice  
Sarge: Apply juice to what  
Snake: Directly to the forehead  
Fox: Great chat everyone  
#####  
Cub: Rules are made to be broken.  
Fox: They were made to be followed. Nothing is made to be broken.  
Sarge: Uh, piñatas.  
Wolf: Glow sticks.  
Eagle: Karate boards.  
Snake: Spaghetti when you have a small pot.  
Cub: Rules.  
Fox:


	3. Chapter 3

Cub: Good responses for being stabbed with a knife?  
Fox: Rude.  
Wolf: That’s fair.  
Snake: Not again.  
Eagle: Are you going to want this back?

#####  
Cub: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life  
Fox: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years!  
Wolf: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!  
Snake: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!  
Eagle: My moral code, is that you?  
Cub:  
Cub: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my mother left me but do you guys need a hug?

#####  
Cub: You kidnapped Fox? That’s illegal!  
Wolf: But Cub, what’s more illegal? Briefly inconveniencing Fox, or destroying our dreams?  
Cub: Kidnapping Fox, Wolf!!!  
Snake: Cub, listen, whatever I may think of you right now- these guys are counting on you to inspire them!  
Cub: What, to kidnap people?!?!  
Snake: To work together!  
Cub: TO KIDNAP PEOPLE?!?!?!?!  
Eagle: Cub, we all agreed a celebrity is a not a people.

#####  
Cub: That's it, we're gonna go out and find what we need!  
Snake: To the city?  
Cub: Yeah, no matter what!  
Eagle: Well- How exactly do you propose we do that, exactly?  
Cub: I... I don't know!  
Fox: Oh come off it, be serious!  
Cub: I am serious!  
Fox: You're insane!  
Wolf: Why, if only we were all wiener dogs, our problems would be solved!  
Everyone:  
Cub: What???  
Wolf: Or maybe it was a basset hound!  
Fox, panicked: YOU'RE ALL INSANE!

#####  
Cub: You're a loose cannon, Fox.  
Fox: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?  
Wolf: I think you play by your own rules.  
Snake: No way, they think rules were made to be broken.  
Cub: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.  
Fox: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. Eagle is a loose cannon.  
Eagle: *smashes a chair*

#####  
Cub: What does 'take out' mean?  
Fox: Food.  
Wolf: Dating  
Snake: Murder  
Eagle: IT CAN MEAN ALL THREE IF YOU'RE NOT A COWARD.

#####  
Cub: Is having a penis fun?  
Fox: It has its ups and downs.  
Wolf: Sometimes it’s a little hard.  
Snake: It’s a pain in the ass.  
Eagle: Oh, Jesus, fuck, guys, come on.

#####  
Cub: What’s something you guys are better than Fox at?  
Wolf: Mario Kart.  
Snake: Yeah, video games.  
Eagle: Emotional vulnerability.

#####  
Cub: Good morning.  
Fox: Good morning.  
Wolf: Good morning.  
Snake: You all sound like robots, try spicing it up a bit.  
Eagle: MORNING MOTHERFUCKERS

#####  
Cub: Where's Fox, Wolf, and Snake?  
Eagle: They're playing hide and seek.  
Cub: Where?  
Eagle: I don't think you get how this game works.

#####  
Cub: Looking left cause you don’t treat me right  
Fox: Looking right because you left  
Wolf: Looking up cause you let me down  
Snake: Looking down cause you fucked up  
Eagle: What is wrong with you guys

#####  
Eagle: I’m an idiot.  
Fox:  
Wolf:  
Snake:  
Cub:  
Eagle:  
Fox: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.

#####  
Cub: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends.  
Fox: ... Your what?  
Cub: My friends.  
Wolf: Are they saying “friends”?  
Snake: I think they're being sarcastic.  
Eagle: No, no, no, this is delirium, they've cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Cub! All of your friends are in this room.  
Cub: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.

#####  
Cub: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses.  
Fox: This knife is actually a magic wand.  
Wolf: Meet me in the Denny’s parking lot for a wizard duel.  
Snake: *cocks gun* Magic missile.  
Eagle: What the fuck is wrong with you people.

#####  
Cub: Bye Fox! Bye Wolf! Bye Snake! Bye Eagle! Bye Fox!  
Wolf: You said ‘bye Fox’ twice.  
Cub: I like Fox.

#####  
Cub: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do?  
Fox: Have everyone stand.  
Wolf: Bring three more chairs!  
Snake: The most important ones can sit down.  
Eagle: Kill three.

#####  
Eagle: I’ve done a lot of dumb stuff.  
Fox: I witnessed the dumb stuff.  
Wolf: I recorded the dumb stuff.  
Snake: I joined in on the dumb stuff.  
Cub: I TRIED TO STOP YOU FROM DOING THE DUMB STUFF!!!


	4. Chapter 4

Fox: Dammit, Wolf!  
Wolf: What?! It wasn’t me!  
Fox: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Snake!  
Snake: Not me either.  
Fox: Oh...Then who set the house on fire?  
Eagle: *whistles*

#####  
Fox: Wake me up…  
Wolf: Before you go go!  
Snake: When September ends…  
Eagle: WAKE ME UP INSIDE-

#####  
Fox: Self care is actually getting into fights with randoms in dark alleys.  
Snake: No, self care is stuff like taking a bubble bath, or putting on a lot of makeup if you like it, or taking a nice warm nap!  
Wolf: Self care is the burning heat when rage washes over you!! Self care is when you feel the bones crack under your powerful fists!! Self care is the fear in your enemies’ eyes!!!  
Eagle: Lmao self care is taking your birthday cake just so I can eat the frosting.  
Fox: If you touch my birthday cake I’ll make you eat your hands

#####  
Fox: You lying, cheating, piece of shit!  
Wolf: Oh yeah? You’re the idiot who thinks you can get away with everything you do. WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD  
Fox: I’m leaving you, and I’M TAKING SNAKE WITH ME  
Eagle, picking up the monopoly board: I think we’re gonna stop playing now.

#####  
Fox, about Wolf: Apparently we’re getting someone new in the group.  
Snake: Are we stealing them?  
Eagle: New or used?  
Fox: Wonderful responses, both of you.

#####  
Fox: On a scale from “damn Daniel” to “fre sha vaca do”, how are you feeling?  
Wolf: In between “it’s an avocado, thanks” and “how did you defeat Captain America”, but as a solid answer I would say “I don’t need a degree to be a clothing hanger”. How about you, Snake?  
Snake: Probably “road work ahead”.  
Eagle: I speak many languages, and this is none of them.

#####  
Fox: On the count of three, what's your favorite cake? One, two, three-  
Fox and Wolf, in unison: Chocolate cake peanut butter frosting with chocolate chunks!  
Snake: Our turn, Eagle! One, two, three- vanilla!  
Eagle, deadpan: I've never had cake, what is cake.

#####  
Fox: Wolf, I'm sad.  
Wolf: *Holds out arms for a hug* It’s going to be okay.  
Snake: Eagle, I'm sad.  
Eagle, nodding: mood.

#####  
Fox: *Trying to fill out legal paperwork stuff* Were you guys born AMAB or AFAB?  
Wolf: Bold of you to assume I was born at all.  
Snake: I personally was created in a lab.  
Eagle: I just straight up spawned lol.

#####  
Fox: Why is Wolf so sad?  
Snake: They took one of those “Which Character Are You?” quizzes  
Fox: And...?  
Wolf: They got Eagle.

#####  
*Fox's helping Wolf out after they get injured, while the others are watching*  
Snake: How does Wolf look?  
Eagle: A little better than you, actually.

#####  
*Fox is cooking*  
Wolf: Any chance that’s for me?  
Fox: It’s for Eagle. I’m planning on making some bad choices tonight, and I need them on my side.  
Snake: I never realized the forethought that went into being a disappointment

#####  
Fox: Wolf isn’t answering their phone  
Snake: I’ll call  
Fox: Eagle and I have both tried six times each, what makes you thi-  
Wolf: Hello?

#####  
Fox, banging on the door: Wolf! Open up!  
Wolf: Well, it all started when I was a kid...  
Snake: No, they meant-  
Eagle: Let them finish.

#####  
Fox: How did none of you hear what I just said?  
Wolf: I’ve been zoned out for the past two and a half hours.  
Snake: I got distracted about halfway through.  
Eagle: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.

#####  
Fox: Isn’t it weird that we pay money to see other people?  
Wolf: Plane tickets?  
Snake: Concert tickets?  
Eagle: Prostitution?  
Fox, holding their broken frames: Glasses.

#####  
Fox: Listen, I can explain...  
Wolf: You’re making $500,000 and you’re only gonna pay me $30,000?  
Snake: You’re getting 30 grand? I’m getting $1,000!  
Eagle: You guys are getting paid?

#####  
Fox: *Gently taps table*  
Wolf: *Taps back*  
Snake: What are they doing?  
Eagle: Morse code.  
Fox: *Aggressively taps table*  
Wolf: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-

#####  
Fox: Truth or dare?  
Wolf: Dare  
Fox: I dare you to kiss the hottest person in the room  
Wolf: Hey eagle  
Eagle, blushing: Yeah?  
Wolf: Could you move? I’m trying to get to snake

#####  
Fox: Is stabbing someone immoral?  
Wolf: Not if they consent to it.  
Eagle: Depends who you’re stabbing.  
Snake: YES?!?

#####  
Fox: There is no future. there is no past. do you see? Time is simultaneous, an intricately structured jewel that humans insist on viewing one edge at a time, when the whole design is visible in every facet.  
Wolf:  
Snake:  
Eagle:  
Everyone Else At Fox’s Surprise Birthday Party:  
Wolf: All I asked was if you wanted to cut your birthday cake first.

#####  
Fox, setting down a card: Ace of spades  
Wolf, pulling out an Uno card: +4  
Snake, pulling out a Pokémon card: Jolteon, I choose you  
Eagle, trembling: What are we playing

#####  
Fox: Have you seen a person named 'Wolf' around here?  
Snake: Ugh, yes. They made a horrible mess of the blood fountain.  
Eagle: It looks fine to me?  
Snake: IT USED TO BE WATER!!!

#####  
Snake: Why are Fox and Wolf sitting with their backs to each other?  
Eagle: They had a fight.  
Snake: Then why are they holding hands?  
Eagle: They get sad when they fight.

#####  
Fox: You know those things will kill you, right?  
Wolf, pouring another glass of whiskey: That’s the point.  
Snake, smoking a cigarette: We’re trying to speed up the process.  
Eagle: *Nods while eating raw cookie dough*

#####  
Cop: You’re receiving a ticket for having three people on one motorcycle.  
Fox: Shit.  
Wolf: Wait, three?  
Cop: Yeah?  
Snake: OH MY GOD EAGLE FELL OFF!!!

#####


End file.
